Hazel Grace Imagine waking up and feeling like someone was drowning you, holding your throat so you couldn’t breathe. In the book, “The Fault in Our Stars” by John Green, that is a very well-known feeling for 16 year old Hazel Grace. Hazel has Stage 4 Thyroid cancer, incurable and leaving her body to slowly deteriorate. She lives her daily life watching reruns of television shows and not caring if her short pixie cut hair is brushed or if her oversized clothes are dirty. Hazel lets every day slowly pass by, until she meets the witty and smart Augustus Waters, Stomachache survivor.
His interest in Hazel leads them on a journey of getting to know each other and falling in love. Before meeting Gus, Hazel isolated herself from everyone and was afraid and helpless but throughout the Story she begins to open up and become more Optimistic about life and ends being very grateful and at peace with the people she was able to let into her life. Before Hazel met Gus, she was isolated and helpless. She was afraid that if she let anyone in, she would only just hurt them when she died. Her parents thought she was depressed because she didn’t do much of anything except think about dying.
Late in the winter of my seventeenth year, my mother decided I was depressed, presumably because I rarely left the house, spent quite a lot of time in bed, read the same book over and over, ate infrequently, and devoted quite a bit of my abundant free time to thinking about death”(7). Her parents encourage her to make friends, but she still isolates herself from getting close to people because she feels like she will hurt them too badly. Hazel’s parents have talked to her about her feelings, but as she tells them she wants them to have a life after her, they are ginning to understand why she has a hard time making friends. I am a grenade mom. At some point will blow up and would like to minimize the casualties. Want to stay away from people and read books and think and be with you guys because there is nothing I can do about hurting you. Can’t be a regular teenager because I’m a grenade. ” (101) Hazel doesn’t give herself the chance to be happy, she only thinks about the side effects of the negative parts of her trying to be happy. But when Hazel meets Augustus Waters, her opinion on the world starts to change. She met him at support group, while he was talking about how surviving Stomachache left him with a prosthetic leg.
He immediately took an interest in her blue eyes, soft smile, and dry humor. Even though she can’t stop thinking of feelings like a grenade, she can’t help falling for Augustus. They went on many little adventures, and the more time they spent together the more happy Hazel was. They sometimes just drove around and one of the many times they were in his room, they were talking about his basketball career and how everything ended when he got cancer. “And then I crawled into his unmade bed, rapping myself in his comforter like a cocoon, surrounding myself with his smell.
I took out my canella so I could smell better, breathing him and out, the scent fading even as I lay there, my chest burning until I couldn’t distinguish among the pains. ” As they begin to get to know each other, Hazel starts to open up him and become more optimistic about the world. She doesn’t let life just pass by and wait for the end to come, she enjoys her time with Gus and starts to realize she should be happy. But tragedy hits when Gus is re diagnosed with Stomachache. They try and make the best of of everything, especially since he waited to tell Hazel until after their trip. I’m on a roller coaster that only goes up,” he said. “And it is my privilege and my responsibility to ride all the way up with you,” I said” (156). Hazel and Gus try and help each other the best they can, and open their eyes to the good things and not think about the cancer. As time went on, Hazel really realized how grateful she was for Gus, and everyone around her. Guy’s health was deteriorating even more and they both knew it was almost the end for him. Hazel wasn’t the grenade anymore, Gus was. He was the one who would soon blow up and hurt everyone he encountered.
Hazel realized even though she would be hurt without him, that she was grateful for getting the opportunity to love him. He opened her eyes to her true happiness and made her feel worth living. Gus took Hazel out of her dark place of loneliness. A few days before he died, she told him exactly that, “Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful am for our literal infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful. ” (204) Hazel .NET from being lonely and helpless to opening up to those around her and being grateful for them.